Zomba Floss

Create and Describe Your Own Planet -

Description writing task

Term 2 Weeks 5-6

Purpose of this piece of writing is to:

Learning Intentions

I am learning to use language features to
make my writing interesting and engaging for the reader.

I am learning to use topic-specific vocabulary.

I am learning to include Te Reo Māori words in my writing.

I will be successful when I can show….

-I have used some language features to make my
writing interesting and engaging (simile, metaphor,
alliteration, onomatopoeia, rhyme)

-I have carefully chosen some topic specific words to'
include in my writing.

-I have used some Te Reo Māori

Focus

We are continuing to look at descriptive writing. This week you are writing a descriptive piec
e of writing to promote your imaginary planet. You aim is to convince people to move to your planet
. You want your writing to allow the reader to be able to imagine what it is like on your planet.

First, we will look at an excerpt of a video describing the moon from the Avatar movie.
Click here to get to video= Pandora.

Second, we will discuss together what you will need in your work to make it successful
and look at how to plan our work. Then you will plan your work and check with a teacher before you start writing.

Third, do your piece of writing.

Fourth, complete you piece of writing. Remember to proof-read
(check spelling and punctuation) and edit (does it make sense? do you need to change any sentences?)
yourself and with a buddy and fill in your self and peer-assessment. Check it with a teacher.

my writting

Zomba Floss

The planet Zomba Floss is 946,000,000,000,000,000,000 light years away  in the Koukog Galaxy.
It is the only planet in the Koukog Galaxy. This galaxy has no sun.
The Zomba Floss planet is able to survive without a sun because it has a rock in
the middle of its core that is 873,973,000,001℃   which gives the planet wera(warmth/hot)
and there are some holes in the ground that go to the rock that give out light.

The weather on Zomba Floss is always good because there is no rā and no kātao,
as they do not need any. But don’t worry we can get a similar substance to water by mixing flour with
crooce*.  The atmosphere is not oxygen but humans can still breath it.

There two different types of life on Zomba Floss.
One is crooce. Crooce is a plant that looks a bit like grass but is definitely not!
It is made up of completely different molecules and its dna code is unique and unlike any other
Crooce is also tawa. The other living creature is touitgh.
Touitgh is a black creature with a roundish body and six legs it  
also has two arms that start on it back and came up and connected to its
shoulders then keep going about a 50 cm to a metre.
Touitgh are very protective of their planet and if tauiwi (visertes/foreigner)
go on it they swes will kill as instantly with their sonar!

To get to the planet Zomba Floss first you need to go to Jupiter's moon Autonoe
and get a korps rock. The korps rock is a kakariki rock.
That can hypnotize touitgh so they don’t kill you.
Then you need to freeze yourself then you can go their in a v.g.p once you are in 20 aho
(light) minutes of Zomba Floss you can defrost yourself and continue on with the journey.

The reasons that you would go to Zomba Floss are:
if you  eat crooce raw you live forever, the have a lot off renta* mines.
Zomba floss is a beautiful planet with high hills and great views.
It is a safe planet and a great place to live.

*crooce is a plant that is a bit like grass that grows on Zomba Floss. I will explain more later.

*renta is a future metal that is more valuable than gold

By Brighid